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Monday, 19 October 2015

Why You Shouldn't Dismiss Flirtation as Harmless


Flirting games ring about as harmless in our minds as do reindeer games.
The modern definition of flirting is best found in the Urban Dictionary which reads, "A person who is innocently overly friendly, especially the type of friendliness that is interpreted as seduction." We encounter natural attractions for whatever reason all the time.

It's a complete mystery as to the why one person is attracted to another and the initial attraction is not something we can control. After that initial reaction, however, we certainly can control what happens next.

This is a difficult message to write because we do not need to make mountains out of molehills. Yet,
flirting is exactly where cheating begins, so it would be highly irresponsible of us as men not to take a strong look at it.

This is an era where apps like Tinder make "hooking up" way too easy, and 32 million married people were recently exposed by hackers as users of the married hookup site, Ashley Madison. That's an enormous figure. All Pro Dad strives to strengthen families and marriages.

Flirting outside of your relationship is a slippery slope that will lead nowhere safe for the future of your family. Let's take a look at the reasons, actions and ramifications of flirting.

Why Do Taken Men Flirt?
The common justifications are to blame it all on your partner. "She doesn't give me enough attention," or "She isn't affectionate enough for me." Maybe she slacked off laughing at all the silly jokes over time.

But the real reason is ... the male ego is mighty and it wants to be fed. I testify to this humbly and honestly, that I have the capacity for an ego as large as the Great Lakes. I like it when the opposite sex shows me attention in that kind of way because it validates something deep inside my DNA.

As a young married man, a few times, this got me into situations that were hurtful to my equally young wife. As a maturing married man, it nailed me once again as sort of a last gasp: Am I still desirable at this point or have I passed my prime? Ego can get us into a hot mess in a hurry.

I'm a man of deep faith, and God directly intervened with me on this. It was impressed that I had been provided a tremendous gift in my wife and she would be all I ever need in all ways. It truly saved me from destruction.

Where Are the Dangers?
This is now a digital world, and the ability to flirt has been infinitely expounded. There is something for every taste and if you go looking, you'll surely find. Even if you aren't looking, it may find you, especially on social media formats. Tread carefully.

Social media is equally as powerful when designated for good, but we must remain diligent in creating boundaries to protect our families and marriages. If you have any doubt at all about what you're doing, get out.

Ramifications and Solutions
The most serious ramification of habitual flirting is that your relationship deteriorates each time. The foundation gets cracked and falls to pieces. This is emotional betrayal, and few things are as damaging to our wives. Loyalty means everything to a woman. When they feel it slipping away, and they always do, they will withdraw emotionally from you as well. That's like introducing a deadly disease to the bloodstream of marriage.

The toughest, most rugged and manly thing we can do is simply pray and stop doing it. All of us, including our egos, are to be placed solely in her trust and care.

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